Thank you people... you're stars one and all.

The support I've received from friends here this last few days has helped me tremendously... you are a bunch of very beautiful people.

I have little to offer in return...

...while you are like the butterfly.

I'm really tired this evening and will be heading for a quiet corner shortly. Hope to see you all tomorrow.

The day's business is over... I'm delighted to have it out of the way... but not yet in the mood to share things from the day.

Completely off topic then and before you just bin things out of hand... stop and consider whether your actions are justified...

They always say there's many a good tune played on an old fiddle don't they... fair enough I suppose... there's always life in the old dog isn't there...

Seems to me there's many a use for an old boot too!

Thank you all for your kind thoughts and good wishes; I really do appreciate them all.

Yesterday's group therapy session probably wasn't as bad as I'd imagined it might be, but it was pretty horrible. Looking around the room at the other depressives and listening to their stories/experiences made me feel worse, not better.

Yes there was commonality between us and of course it's good to know you are not alone. But the sadness demonstrated by the members of the group brought on by the debilitating nature of our common illness was in itself depressing... not a good state of being for a bunch of already depressive types I'd have thought.

As soon as the session was over I was out the door and gone; the "do stay for a cup of tea and a chat" offer didn't appeal at all; I know others obviously felt the same way since I wasn't the only one running away yesterday.

So okay, I conquered the initial fears and turned up to the session. I even tried to engage with the session to some extent... and I will be going to the next one... I'm less certain about the next eight though.

Feeling the need for solitude I followed my usual pattern and ran away to somewhere quiet where I could be alone with my thoughts. For me this is therapy in itself... the ability to lose myself in my own thoughts and just be... it may not always be healthy, but it generally seems to help...

I sat here for hours
Through sunshine and showers
Trying to make sense of all that;
The damp from the grass
Soaked through to my ass
And now I've a pain in my back.

The sniff in my nose
From the wet of my clothes
Is thanks to the rain that came down.
A further depression
From my therapy session
Brings a facial expression; a frown.

And so to today's ordeal...

Last night was filled with vivid and quite disturbing dreams... a trait I've noticed when my head is particularly troubled. My sleep, such as it was, has left me weary, lethargic and generally sluggish... not an ideal state for a day when I know I'll need my wits about me.

Today's Friday, today's Friday, Friday is fish
Thursday is shepherd's pie
Wednesday is roast beef
Tuesday is soup
Monday is washing day
Is everybody happy?
Not yet.... but maybe one day....