There's many a music-hall joke about families and particularly members of the family-in-law...

A few of my favourites include:

I wouldn't say that my mother in law was ugly, but every time she puts on lipstick, it tries to crawl back into the tube.

Two men were in a pub. One says to his mate, "My mother in law is an angel." His friend replies, "You're bloody lucky; mine's still alive!"

I bought my mother in law a chair for Christmas, but she wouldn't plug it in.

My mother in law told me, "I'll see you dead and dance on your grave." I hope you so... I'm being buried at sea.

I wouldn't say my mother in law is ugly... but around her way, the Peeping Toms are giving themselves up to the police.

Okay, okay I know... lot's of mothers-in-law are really nice people... I still haven't found one though. ;)

No, seriously, my mother-in-law's tongue is so sharp I'm constantly surprised it hasn't been listed as a dangerous weapon! I keep expecting her to turn herself in when there's a knife armistice...

Mother-in-law's tongue
:))

No offence to any mothers-in-law out there (mine excepted!).